Reflection on S Baqarah ayahs 92-103

“Am I ready for death ? What kind of actions have my hands sent forth? Are they actions of people of Jannah or people of Hell? Do I still have time? What can I do to prepare?”
I had a dream two days ago. I was comparing myself to the disbelievers and being grateful that I was a Muslim. I also told myself that my Eman was becoming a little weak and that I should utilize all the precious time that I had to remember Allah as much as I could because I could die any moment. Once I would die, there would be nothing I could do to change what I have done and to repent for my sins. So I would have to start doing everything now.
I don’t consider myself ready for death yet. I have to start improving my Eman and spending more time in remembering Allah than wasting it in the dunya. I think that some of my actions are of the people of Hell and that there’s room for more improvement. 
I don’t think that I have time because when I wake up in the morning there are chances that I may live to see tomorrow. Every change that I need to make should be made NOW. Once I die I can’t go back to change myself.
I can prepare for death by remembering and worshipping Allah more and by refraining from activities that can weaken my Eman. I need to make a list of all the things which I’m doing wrong and I need to start working now to positively change each and every one of them. I also need to pay off my debts to Allah, like days which I have not fasted etc. I need to start repenting for all my sins sincerely. If I start acting now and actually do all of this I can be better prepared for death inshAllah.

About Quran Reflections

Al-Huda's branch at Khayaban-e-Sehar is one of the few Quran courses being regularly conducted in Karachi, Pakistan, where the mode of instruction and examination is English. The students and teachers have decided to upload their reflections on the Quran and class notes on this blog, in order to be available to a global audience for the latter's benefit and inspiration.
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1 Response to Reflection on S Baqarah ayahs 92-103

  1. FAB says:

    Am I ready for death? Practically speaking, no, I’m not. I initially came closer to Islam after fearing what would happen to me after I died. Would I be able to face Allah? Or would I be completely ashamed? After this, I started preparing, I turned towards what is right; praying, fasting, charity, etc. All the outward signs that make one believe they are “religious”. However, whilst doing this, unknowingly I was also falling into the trap of Shaitaan, the trap of arrogance. I would evaluate every now and then whether I was more “religious” or not, and obviously come up with the answer that I was. What I was unaware of was that I was also somewhere thinking “oh well, its ok if my namaz isn’t consistent, I’m praying more than I used to” or “well, its ok if this isn’t 100%, at least I’m trying” or, the best of all, “Well, at least I’m more practicing than that person over there”.

    I have come to realise it is not just outward, physical actions that mimic the actions of the people of Jannah, our internal self has to be like theirs also. Outwardly we may change, but until our internal self changes, we’re not much better than before.

    So, no, I am not ready, I don’t know how much time I have to prepare. But what I do know is that if I start changing outwardly, and internally, I am on the path to preparation. All I have to do is remember this is a long journey, one that won’t happen overnight or easily, and so rather than putting things off, I have to start acting now.

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