Analyze your speech. How do you speak to others? Is it in the best way no matter who you are speaking to?
One of my favorite quotes has been: Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold – but so does a hard-boiled egg. ~Author Unknown
Our actions include our speech which is in the forefront. I realize that speech is the key to human relations. I may intend for it to be a sincere advice or sincere discussion, but if it is not conveyed in the best way with the right choice of words, the correct intonation and the correct time, it does not get through.
The Qur’an is alhumdulillah teaching me methodologies of saying what is to be said and to stay quiet when it is required. The latter of which was harder for me to follow. Through the tafseer of these ayahs, I learn the quantity of speech is also relevant. I will talk talk talk then I don’t usually know what I just said or what the real message was. I am learning to be more aware of it now. Dealing with people is the hardest thing for me. The phrase “ qaulan maroofa” has taken new meanings with ayahs of the Quran. When I have started using “ahsan” speech (and I still slip frequently with this implementation!), I realize the immediate change in people’s behavior. So I realize that what I say, how I say it can actually instigate either a positive or negative reaction. Speech affects all areas: in the workplace, at home and all areas of dealings with people and even with children. They are always watching what you say and how you say.
I have to work on adopting a more gentle tone when speaking to people in general. Inshallah I pray a lot for my dealings to work out with those in my surrounding.